The worst day fishing is better than the best day working.
Save the Whales, Shoot the Seals.
I want to be like Barbie, that witch gets everything she wants.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
Time is what keeps everything from happening at once.
I love cats...they taste just like chicken.
Cover me. I'm changing lanes.
The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.
Conserve toilet paper, use both sides.
REHAB is for quitters.
I get enough exercise just pushing my luck!
Sometimes I wake up grumpy; Other times I let her sleep.
All men are Idiots, and I married their King!
I want to die in my sleep, not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car....
Work is for people who don't know how to fish.
I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
Your kid may be an honor student but you're still an IDIOT!
I Brake For No Apparent Reason.
I may be fat, but you're ugly - I can lose weight!
Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.
Read all jokes from:Driving (+102)
