Alien Barbie - don't tell ANYONE...
Amazon Barbie - in a leopard skin outfit
'Arnold' Ken - big and buff, no neck
Avalanche Barbie - buried in 16 feet of snow
Baler Barbie - wrapped in twine; also known as Farm Accident Barbie
Banjo Barbie - complete with straw hat and Earl Scruggs cassette
Banzai Barbie - a small tree cut into a shape that vaguely resembles Barbie
Barbie Brain in a Jar - an empty jar
Barbie of Borg - you will buy one. Resistance is futile!
Barbie-Got-Run-Over-by-a-Reindeer - an excellent Holiday gift idea
Barney Barbie - bloated, plush, and purple; pull the string and she spouts inane drivel
Battering Ram Barbie - Barbie's head on the end of a battering ram
Bearded Barbie - complete with tweezers
Bigfoot Barbie - sold mostly in the Northwest
Biker Barbie - complete with leathers and tattoos
Bladder Control Barbie - comes with a free box of Depends undergarments
Blockhead Barbie - doll with Charlie Brown's head
Body-Piercing Barbie - comes with mini-piercing gun and mini-body ornaments
Bow-Legged Barbie - high Stepper not included
Broken Bungee Barbie - Barbie doll lying broken on the pavement
Bugs Barbie - buckteeth, long ears
Cadaver Barbie - removable internal organs
Cartoon-style 'Hit-in-the-Head-with-a-Falling-Anvil' Barbie
Chain Smoker Barbie - with Surgeon General's warning on box
Chernobyl Barbie - glows in the dark
Circus Clown Barbie - complete with scary face paint and scary wig
Crash Test Barbie - comes with car and brick wall
Cross-Dressing Ken, er, Barbie, er, Ken - who knows!
Cut-the-Lady-in-Half-Magic-Trick-that-Went-Wrong Barbie
Cyberpunk Barbie - includes 'trodes and implants
Cyclops Barbie - one eye, right in the middle of her forehead; Cyclops Ken sold separately
Darth Vader Barbie - with plastic helmet; pull the string and she sounds like James Earl Jones
Death Row Barbie - comes complete with cell; raunchy cellmate sold separately
Diarrhea Barbie - always on the run; complete with mini-bottle of Pepto!
Dirty Harry Barbie - comes with large caliber pistol; pull the string and she says, "Go ahead *giggle* Make my day!"
Disco Barbie - dressed in chiffon; includes disco ball
Divorce Barbie - includes the house, the car, and half of Ken's belongings
Drag Queen Ken - comes with three, count 'em, three of Barbie's dresses
East German Swim Team Barbie - a Barbie head on a Ken doll
Easter Island Barbie - the famous statue with blonde hair
Ebola Barbie - twelve hours after opening she'll be reduced to nothing
Edible Barbie - also known as Choc-O-Barbie
Elmer Fudd Ken - bald with hunting hat and rifle
Elvira Barbie - with skimpy black gown and long, black hair
Eye Patch Barbie - with a choice of eye patch colors: purple, hot pink, or aqua!
Fast Food Barbie - also known as McBarbie...you want fries with that?
Fat Barbie - in the following three varieties: Big Butt Barbie, Love Handles Barbie, More Chins than a Chinese Phone Book Barbie
FemmiNazi Barbie - pull the string and find out why men stink
Flying Hero Barbie - yes, I know they made this one, but it's at least as ludicrous as anything we came up with!
Forrest Gump Ken - pull his string and he complains for two and a half boring hours
FrankenBarbie - comes with bolts through her neck
Frozen Barbie on a Stick - in your grocer's frozen food section
Funeral Home Barbie - complete with hearse, coffin and kicky little shroud
Gangsta Barbie - complete set of Raiders apparel; rap cassette included
Godzilla Barbie - six foot tall lizard with Barbie head
Green Giant Barbie - Green Giant with Barbie's head--or vice versa
Grunge Barbie - with flannel shirt and a goatee
Headgear Barbie - guaranteed to make kids with braces feel better!
Hippie Barbie - complete with simulated controlled substances and paraphernalia
Hiroshima Barbie - just a shadow of her former self
Hockey Barbie - comes with hockey stick and missing teeth
Homeless Barbie - complete with stolen K-Mart shopping cart
House Wife Barbie - dressed in ratty, old housecoat; comes with dirty laundry and sink full of dishes
Human Cannonball Barbie - complete with spring-loaded cannon that will shoot her 15-20 feet
Hunchback Barbie - pull the string and she cries, "Sanctuary! Sanctuary!"
Jabba the Barbie - Jabba with a Barbie head
Joan of Arc Barbie - comes with stake, kindling, and matches
Jock Barbie - looks like Dennis Rodman
Joker Barbie - Barbie with Joker grin and white face
Junkie Barbie - complete with needle tracks
King Kong Barbie - six foot tall ape holding Barbie doll dressed like Fae Rae
Kleptomaniac Barbie - doll with suction cup hands
Lance Ito Ken - with beard, robe, and entirely too much advertising
LAPD Barbie - comes with two nightsticks, in case one gets broken subduing a suspect. Taser also available.
Las Vegas Showgirl Barbie - complete with pasties
Lion Tamer Barbie - lion is included; Barbie's head is not
Living Dead Barbie - use your imagination
Lumberjack Barbie - sleeps all night, works all day
Mafia Ken - with a violin case...you got a problem with that?
Mafia Victim Barbie - feet set in cement--she really sinks!
Manic-Depressive Barbie - with a set of Oriental throwing knives
Marie Antionette Barbie - with removable head; guillotine included
Marsha Clark Barbie - with a bad haircut and a bad attitude
Medusa Barbie - Barbie with snakes for hair
Mick Jagger Barbie - Mick with Barbie's head...but Mick's lips
Microsoft Barbie - Barbie doll with Bill Gates' head
Militant Femminist Barbie - with an assault rifle
Mortal Kombat Barbie - includes more blood than you can even imagine
Mutant Barbie - Professor Xavier's daughter: bald as a billiard ball, wearing a Dark Phoenix costume
Nancy Kerrigan Barbie - her knees bend backwards
Napoleon Ken - stands 2" tall
Neon Deion Barbie - it costs $35 million, and you just know some idiot's going to buy it...
NRA Barbie - comes with assault rifle and picture of Charlton Heston
One-Eyed-Head-on-a-Spider-Made-from-an-Erector-Set-Barbie - just what it sounds like
Opera Barbie - complete with the horns and the brass brassiere
Oscar Meyer Barbie - Barbie on a bun
Picasso Barbie - everything's in the wrong place
Politically Incorrect Barbie - pull the string and she loudly blurts all your favorite racial slurs
Potato(e) Head Barbie - also just what it sounds like
Power Ranger Barbie - with karate-chop action; complete with the ridiculous outfit
Princess Leia Barbie - Barbie with the hairdo from Star Wars
Rasta Barbie - she's got a tie-dyed t-shirt, dreadlocks and reggae CD; rolling papers sold separately
Rastafarian Barbie - she has dreadlocks and ganja, mon!
Realistic Teenage Barbie - complete with flat chest, braces and acne; pull her string and hear an outpouring of sassy, bratty phrases
Roadkill Barbie - unrecognizable
Rock Climbing Barbie - with climbing gear
Rush Limbarbie - big, no neck, but not buff
Safari Barbie - with rifle, pith helmet, and pygmy guide
Saloon Barbie - dressed like Old West Saloon girl
Samuel L. Jackson Ken - he'll get medieval on you
Shark Attack Barbie - oh, must we describe everything for you?
Sharon Stone Barbie - is there a difference?
Shish-Ka-Barbie - here's one we'd all like to see!
Shock Therapy Barbie - car battery and wires included
Siamese Twins Barbie - complete with surgical instruments
Spear-through-the-Head-Barbie - no description necessary
Spock Ken - with pointy ears; one eyebrow raised
Stampede Barbie - we're not talking about the rodeo in Calgary here...
Steamroller Barbie - doll squashed flat
Steroid Barbie - the rest of her physique is as exaggerated as her bust is on the normal doll!
Stuntman Ken - comes with lots of Band-Aids
Sumo Barbie - comes with thong
T2 Barbie - a study in silver
Tail Hook Barbie - naval uniform with a VERY short skirt
Tammy Fae Barbie - with WAY too much makeup
Tasmanian Barbie - spins like a top!
Tattoo Barbie - with tattoos you can apply!
Teenage Mutant Ninja Barbie - one of the Turtles with Barbie head
Teenage Pregnancy Barbie - complete with dropout forms. Angry parents and deadbeat boyfriend sold separately
Texas Necktie Barbie - with gallows
Tonya Harding Barbie - you didn't think we'd sell one without the other, did you?
Tool Time Barbie - includes tool belt, which she has no idea what to do with
Trailer Park Barbie - for the parent who wants to show their child what grown-up life is really going to be like
Trailer Trash Barbie - complete with doublewide trailer home
Tree Hugger Barbie - pull the string and she spouts environmentalist rhetoric
Two-Face Barbie - Barbie with Tommy Lee Jones' makeup from Batman Forever
Venus de Milo Barbie - made of rock; no head, no arms
Werewolf Barbie - normal doll, except under a full moon
Whoopie Cushion Barbie - do you really need a description?
Witch Doctor Barbie - with potions and face paints
Wookie Barbie - obnoxious blonde hair everywhere
Read all jokes from:Miscellaneous (+55)
