You've ever bathed with flea and tick soap.
You've ever been arrested for a DUI on a riding lawn mower.
You've ever been arrested for bootleggin'.
You've ever been arrested for loitering.
You've ever been arrested for where you got your girlfriend roses.
You've ever been asked for your autograph at a rattlesnake roundup.
You've ever been asked to leave Shoney's all-you-can-eat breakfast.
You've ever been blacklisted by a bowling alley.
You've ever been given a gun as a present.
You've ever been hunting on a tractor.
You've ever been in a fistfight involving the phrase "Dale Earnhardt is the Intimidator".
You've ever been in a fistfight with your best friend because he said his John Deere would out pull your Farmall.
You've ever been involved in a custody fight over a huntin' dog.
You've ever been kicked out of the zoo for heckling the monkeys.
You've ever been pumping gas and another customer asks you to check his oil.
You've ever been stuck in your own driveway.
You've ever been to a wedding reception at the Waffle House.
You've ever been too drunk to fish.
You've ever been trapped in crossfire at a family reunion.
You've ever bought a used cap.
You've ever caught bugs just so you could throw them in the bug zapper.
You've ever changed the numbers on your house so the police can't find you.
You've ever cleaned fish in your living room.
You've ever climbed a water tower with a bucket of paint to defend your sister's honor.
You've ever come home and found crime scene tape across your front porch.
You've ever committed a crime with a lawn mower.
You've ever done your Christmas shopping at a truck stop.
You've ever driven a tractor to a family reunion.
You've ever driven around looking for your porch roof after a bad storm.
You've ever drunk mouthwash just because you're too lazy to walk down to the liquor store.
You've ever entered yourself in a "Howdy Doody Look-alike" Contest.
You've ever fed your date french fries in a Denny's.
You've ever filled your deer tag on the golf course.
You've ever financed a tattoo.
You've ever fished from over a fence.
You've ever given a set of Tupperware ice tea glasses as a wedding present.
You've ever given livestock as a wedding present.
You've ever given rattraps as gifts.
You've ever gone Christmas shopping at the dollar store.
You've ever gotten a "lap" dance from your sister!
You've ever gotten an official letter of recognition from a tobacco or beer company.
You've ever gotten carbon monoxide poisoning while driving your vehicle.
You've ever gotten in fist fight in a laundromat over a dryer.
You've ever gotten into a fist fight over a bowling score.
You've ever had a conversation about truck tires that lasted more than an hour.
You've ever had sex in a sattelite dish.
You've ever had sex while wearing work gloves.
You've ever had Thanksgiving dinner on a Ping-Pong table.
Read all jokes from:Lists (+730), Redneck (+1459)
