BEAUTY
Naked in repose
Silvery silhouette girls
Adorn my mudflaps.
REMORSE
A painful sadness
Cain't fit big screen TV through
Double-wide's front door.
OPTIONS
Unemployment's out.
Hey, maybe I can git on
Disability.
MOTHER AND CHILD
Crusted in boogers,
Stained with Kool-Aid, Pauly has face
Only Mama loves.
BLAZE
Distant siren screams
Dumb-ass Verne's been grilling with
Gasoline again.
A NEW MOON
Flashlights pierce darkness
No nightcrawlers to be found
Guess we'll gig some frogs.
EXUBERANCE
Joyous, playful, bright
Trailer park girl rolls in puddle
Of old motor oil.
ALONE
Seeking solitude
Carl's ex-wife Tammy files fer
Restraining order.
OFFERINGS
Tonight we hunger
Grandma sent grocery money
To Oral Roberts.
DRAMA
Set the VCR
Dukes of Hazzard Marathon
Starts at 9 O'Clock.
DEPRIVED
In WalMart toy aisle
Wailing boy wants rasslin' doll
Mama whups his butt.
NO SIGNAL
White noise, stati buzz
Call Earl; the satellite dish
needs new descrambler.
IMPOUNDED
Sixty-five dollars
And cyclone fence keeps me from
My El Camino.
GATHERING
In early morning mist
Mama searched Circle K for
Moon Pies and Red Man.
PRIDE
Grinning, he displays
The nine hundred beer cans that
Fill his pickup bed.
ALONE
Seeking solitude
Carl's ex-wife Tammy files for
Restraining order.
DESIRE
Damn, in that tube-top
You make me almost forget
That you're my cousin.
PATIENCE
Squirrel gum gleaming
Loaded with rock salt, Earl waits
For the repo man.
REVERENCE
Number 3 inscribed
On jacket, cap, and windshield;
Redneck Trinity.
LUNCH
The handsome redneck
Fixes himself a sandwich
Wearing camo pants.
COUNTERFEITING
Curse you Sam Walton;
Million Dollar bill buys me
Trip to the hoosegow.
HEARTBREAK
Heart a hurtin' bad
Bub left me for his cousin
ET babe comin'.
HERITAGE
Rottweiler's steel bowl
Visqueene covered trailer porch
Ain't takin' my guns.
HAPPINESS
Happiness is when
You know how many hay bails
Fit in your car trunk
REDNECK IS
Listen to country
Your mother is your sister
Go race your damn truck.
HILLBILLY GIRLS
Hillbilly gir-rels
Luv 'em mor'n anythin'
They's warm in winter.
HOME SWEET HOME
It arrives today
Side and side it turns the curve
My double wide home.
NEW SHIRT
Bought a camo shirt
Hung it up in my closet
Now I can't find it.
Read all jokes from:Redneck (+1460)
