A big-shot Anchorage lawyer flew out west to go goose hunting on the Kusko. Decked out in his expensive hunting gear, he shot and dropped a bird, but it fell onto the property of an elder's fish camp. As the lawyer walked into the fish camp to retrieve the bird, the elder asked him what he was doing. The lawyer responded, "I shot that goose and it fell here, and now I'm going to get it."
The elder replied, "This is my property, and that is now my goose." The lawyer said, "Listen, old-timer, I am a Big City Lawyer, if you don't give me that goose, I'll sue you and take everything you own."
The elder smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do things on the river. We settle small disagreements like this with the Three-Kick Rule." The lawyer asked, "What is the Three-Kick Rule?" The elder replied, "Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up." The attorney thought about it and decided he could easily take the little old fellow, and agreed.
The elder slowly climbed down from his chair and walked up to the lawyer with steel-toed boots. His first kick to the lawyer's groin dropped him to his knees. His second kick nearly wiped the man's nose off his face. The lawyer was belly down when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to give up. The lawyer summoned every bit of his will, dragged himself to his feet and wheezed through bleeding lips, "Okay, you old coot, now it's my turn!" The elder smiled and said, "Nope, I give up. The goose is yours."
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