75-year-old Hymie was not looking as he was crossing Golders Green High Street and was hit by a car. It looked quite a bad accident, but luckily for him, he received only a glancing blow. As he was lying in the road, a priest who saw the accident ran over to help. Just in case it was serious, the priest began to administer last rites.
"No thanks, Father," Hymie said as he sat up, "Im not a Catholic."
"What, you're not Catholic?" said the priest, "so why did you make the sign of the cross immediately after the car hit you?"
Hymie replied, "I was just checking."
"Checking? Checking for what?" said the priest.
"Everything important to me - spectacles, testicles, wallet and watch."
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