You've ever stolen a Neighborhood Watch sign to put in your yard.
You've ever stolen clothes from a scarecrow.
You've ever stolen toilet paper from a public restroom.
You've ever stolen toilet paper.
You've ever stood in line more than 1 hour to get your picture taken with a freak of nature.
You've ever stood in line to have your picture taken with a freak of nature.
You've ever stood outside a bathroom and heckled someone inside.
You've ever stood outside a K-mart for more than an hour arguing with the manager about the shirt and shoes law.
You've ever strained your tea through a flyswatter.
You've ever taken a date flowers you've stole from a cemetery.
You've ever taken a generator and a 27-inch TV camping.
You've ever taken reading material into an airplane restroom.
You've ever talked back to characters on the movie screen.
You've ever thrown up in a squad car.
You've ever told the local sheriff that you smell a pig and he replies, "I knew I should have taken a shower after I slopped the hogs today."
You've ever towed another car using panty hose and duct tape.
You've ever used a hangnail as a tooth pick.
You've ever used a laundromat as a mailing address.
You've ever used a toaster to light your cigarette.
You've ever used a toilet brush as a back scratcher.
You've ever used a toilet seat as a picture frame.
You've ever used a weed eater indoors.
You've ever used an inner-tube patch on your jeans.
You've ever used jumper cables to start your computer.
You've ever used lard in bed.
You've ever used scissors on food.
You've ever used your fishing license as a form of identification
You've ever used your ironing board as a buffet table.
You've ever used your only phone call in jail to check the status of Nascar race.
You've ever vacationed in a rest area.
You've ever valet parked a snow plow.
You've ever water-skied in your underwear.
You've ever worn a tie with a flannel shirt.
You've ever worn a tube top to a wedding.
You've ever worn cowboy boots with Bermuda shorts.
You've ever worn hunter's orange to church.
You've ever worn shorts to a funeral home.
You've ever wrestled your mama for the last can of beer.
You've ever yelled "Rock the house Bubba!" during a piano recital.
You've ever yelled out the window "KIDS!! STOP PLAYIN' ON THAT SHEET METAL!'
You've given your gun a woman's name.
You've got a tab at the ABC Liquor Store.
You've got more guns "On Display" than Wal-Mart Sporting Goods.
You've got more than one brother named "Darryl.
You've got more than three cousins named "Bubba".
You've got to shuck your toilet paper before you use it.
You've had a custody fight over a hunting dog.
You've hit on somebody in a VD clinic.
Read all jokes from:Lists (+729), Redneck (+1459)
