You have a bowling machine in your kitchen.
You have a Bud Light pool table light hanging over your dining room table.
You have a bumper sticker that says, "Kiss the crack below my back."
You have a bumper sticker that says, "My mother's an honor student" at the local junior high.
You have a bumper sticker that says, "MY MOTHER'S AN HONOR STUDENT AT SOUTH LITTLE ROCK JR. HIGH."
You have a bunch of pink flamingos on your trailer that you don't play with and you got them from the 1.99 store
You have a choice of walkers, with or without a gun rack.
You have a claw-foot bathtub.
You have a close relative named "Cletus".
You have a color coordinating rope that ties down your car hood.
You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.
You have a Confederate flag for bed sheets.
You have a cow tied to the front bumper of your broken down Chevy truck as a pet.
You have a grave in your yard.
You have a gun rack on the back of your bicycle.
You have a Hefty bag for a Car/Truck convertible top.
You have a Hefty bag on the passenger side window of your car.
You have a hefty bag where the window of your car should be.
You have a hook in your shower to hang your hat on.
You have a house that's mobile and 16 cars that aren't.
You have a lucky rabbit's foot in your pocket and a lucky rabbit nailed above your fireplace.
You have a motor swinging from a tree in your yard, a dog tied to the fence post, and someone sitting in a rocking chair that's over 75 and has a Remington 12 gauge, a spit cup, and Copenhagen in the back pocket.
You have a pallet in your yard with tires stacked on it.
You have a peeing contest with your wife and she wins.
You have a personal account of a UFO sighting.
You have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.
You have a piece of cardboard that says "No Trespassing" beside your front door.
You have a rag for a gas cap.
You have a rebel flag displayed on your truck.
You have a Rebel flag in your front yard!
You have a refrigerator just for beer.
You have a set of 16 matching salad bowls, and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.
You have a sign hanging in your living room that says, "We interrupt this marriage to bring you deer season"
You have a sign on your front door explaining house rules and liability.
You have a tattoo that says "I Love My Mommy" and mommy is spelled wrong.
You have a tennis ball on your antenna.
You have a transmission in your bathtub.
You have a trophy from a tractor pull.
You have a very special baseball cap, just for formal occasions.
Read all jokes from:Lists (+730), Redneck (+1459)
