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Monday, September 12, 2011

The bacon tree

Back in the cowboy days, the westbound wagon train was lost and low on food. No other humans had been seen for days. And then they saw an old Jew sitting beneath a tree.
The leader rushed to him and said, "We're lost and running out of food. Is there someplace ahead where we can get food?"
"Vell," the old Jew said, "I vouldn't go up dat hill und down de other side. Somevun told me you'll run into a big bacon tree."
"A bacon tree?" asked the wagon train leader.
"Yah, ah bacon tree. Trust me. For nuttin vud I lie."
The leader goes back and tells his people that if nothing else, they might be able to find food on the other side of the next ridge.
"So why did he say not to go there?" some pioneers asked.
"Oh, you know those Jews-they don't eat bacon."
So the wagon train goes up the hill and down the other side. Suddenly, Indians attack and massacre everyone except the leader, who manages to escape back to the old Jew, who's enjoying a "glassel tea."
The near-dead man starts shouting. "You old fool! You sent us to our deaths!
We followed your instructions, but there was no bacon tree. Just hundreds of Indians, who killed everyone."
The old Jew holds up his hand and says "Oy, vait a minute."
He then gets out an English-Yiddish dictionary, and begins thumbing through it. "Gevalt, I made myself ah big mistake."
"It vuz not a bacon tree. It vuz a ham bush!"

Read all jokes from:Jewish (+6997)


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